there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
