Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
is wine microwaveable?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Randomize
