Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I'm going to jail i love you
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
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