I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
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