Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
i think im in europe. pls send help
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
