I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
