is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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