I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
