TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
