STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
