Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
