After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize