so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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