her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize
