You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
