i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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