He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
