Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
