It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
