Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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