its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
