...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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