Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
