tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
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