i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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