That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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