Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
