i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
