I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
