Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
