So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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