I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
