that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
