i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
