During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Randomize
