Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
