Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
