is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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