I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
stop calling my apartment porn island.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
The Olympian is in my bed
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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