My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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