I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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