Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Randomize
