I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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