im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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