im about as happy as oj after his trial
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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