Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
