is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
