I cockslap morals
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
