just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Text me some of your sweat
I think I just sharted jello shots
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
