He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
send nudes
from the living room?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
