I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
